sleep

Calm Parenting – Take Care of Yourself First

I speak with so many moms in our workshops, and lately a common complaint is they are “running on empty.” Moms comment they aren’t getting enough sleep, aren’t eating well and feel increasingly stressed. Basically, they just aren’t taking care of themselves. Some cite the time crunch, others the effort after taking care of everyone else in the family. Whatever the cause, feeling empty is such a difficult way to come at parenting.

  • Sleep – It’s suggested that most adults need seven to nine hours of sleep each night. The National Sleep Foundation provides this article on sleep needs: http://www.sleepfoundation.org/article/how-sleep-works/how-much-sleep-do-we-really-need.
  • Nutrition – I’ve never been one to count calories or limit foods, but, as I am getting older, I can feel food choices impacting my mood and energy levels. HelpGuide.org provides this interesting article on nutrition guidelines for women: http://www.helpguide.org/life/healthy_eating_women_nutrition.htm.
  • Stress – When you can directly manage the stressor, all the better. It’s best if you can cut back on work hours or better design your schedule, and relieve stress at the source. If not, here is an article with so many great suggestions for managing stress: http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parenting/stress.shtml.
  • Exercise – When I can fit in exercise, I feel great. It is so hard to find the time and energy. I am inspired by one of our preschool teacher/moms who fits exercise in in small ways throughout the day. She lunges to take out the trash and stretches before she sits for each meal. Apparently, a little at a time adds up in beneficial ways. For lots of great tips about exercising read: http://exercise.about.com/od/fittinginexercise/tp/stayathomeexercise.htm, and visit a great blog at  http://www.exercisingmom.com/.
  • Relax – Do whatever it is that helps you relax. Read, run, sing, dance, wine with friends, walks in the park or nature hikes. The more you can refresh and recharge before you take on parenting, the better!

The Importance of Sleep Associations

Sleep associations can be a very important thing for helping your child fall asleep and stay asleep through the night. Sleep associations are what your child has or experiences in the few minutes before they nod off and fall asleep. For my daughter this is her nightlight, her stuffed animal, favorite blanket, the noise from the fan in the hall and her firm pillow. When sleep associations are a constant, they become habit and help her fall asleep.

Night wakefulness is a normal part of the sleep cycle, in between cycles people rouse a bit. Children gradually learn how to nod back off and basically sleep through the normal, brief periods of wakefulness. It can be an easier process if the child has all of their sleep associations throughout the night. When a child is falling asleep in their own space, with their sleep associations that are constant, such as a nightlight or white noise that plays all night, they are much better able to soothe themselves and continue sleeping during the wakefulness. If a child is held or rocked to sleep and then placed in bed, when they have normal night wakefulness, they are much more likely to fully wake and call out because overtime they are dependent on the rocking as a sleep association to be able to stay or fall asleep. If your children are waking and calling out often through the night, sleep associations may be part of the difficulty and are an easy thing to check.

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